"Salt"

I still remember when I saw “Aliens” and saw Ellen Ripley kick alien ass. That was the iconic role that created a whole new genre, female action star. Since then, we’ve seen a slew of action heroines on the big screen and on the small screen. We can point to Jennifer Garner on “Alias”, Uma Thurman in the “Kill Bill” movies, there is Mila Jovovich in the Resident Evil movies.  But for me, the biggest female action star is Angelina Jolie, she started with the Lara Croft movies, then “Mr & Mrs. Smith”, “Wanted” and now “Salt”.

 There is no doubt the woman can act, from the unbelievably expressive eyes to the funny way she stands with her hands at the ready for a fight. She looks like that spunky little tomboy who ignores the fact that even though she’s up against a bigger, stronger guy and will probably get hurt, she’s still going in fighting. She won’t give up until she’s bloody and scarred, but she won’t let anyone take her without a fight.

Like every action movie, the star will persevere under extraordinary odds, s/he will leap tall buildings, battle armies and even when the odds are arraigned against them, they will find a way. It’s a movie, it is fiction and we suspend belief to enjoy the visceral joy of living vicariously through their battles.

I always come out of a movie theater driving a little too fast. I take a curb (or try to) on two wheels. It’s the adrenaline rush. As a kid I came out of “Conan the Barbarian” practicing how to hold my sword (broom handle), leaping across the living room, bouncing off the couch and diving under the dining room table.

I know Jolie is wired and harnessed as she does her scenes, some are obviously stunt doubles. The movie itself was fair. I think the only reason the movie works is because it’s Jolie. And she’s got some very good supporting actors, Live Schrieber  stars as Salt’s boss and Chiwetel Ejiofor is a counterintelligence agent who set out to catch Salt after she’s been accused of being a Russian mole.

In a blink-and-you’ll-miss-him role is Andre Braugher, wasted in a group scene. I don’t remember him even having a line.

The movie is predictable; I had a suspicion of how it would turn out very early on. I think Hollywood needs to rethink their concept of what a trailer should be. Before the feature film came on, there were trailers for other movies and I wondered just how much of the action sequences were given away? Some trailers are better than what the movie turns out to be.

You’ll get no spoilers from my review; I don’t read the ‘professional’ reviews,nor the hype machine until after I watch the movie. I came out of watching “Wanted” scared at how skinny Jolie looked. Her sunken eyes, thin, almost cadaverous frame, but then I learned that it was the first movie she made after her beloved mother’s death. So I took that into account. But in Salt, she looks frail.

There’s a scene early on when she’s running from the CIA agents, a backpack slung across her back, her hair tucked into a plain brown knit winter cap and I swear I was reminded of the little boy in the Japanese Gozilla movies. Her backpack bounced on her back just like the little kid. In fact, she looked like a little kid and looked like she was struggling to run fast. Her arms pumping hard, she looked awfully thin. Her clothes hang from her, look at her legs.

I want to invite her to a nice rich Italian dinner full of meat sauce and pasta, please get some meat on those bones!

I really liked “Mr. & Mrs. Smith” not because of the eye candy Brangelina, but because it had a sense of humor. Maybe if they give Angelina Jolie a script with action and just a hint of humor, she could truly be a premier action heroine. She’s got a beautiful smile, but most of her action roles has her frowning and glowering, she’s such a good actress that when she glowers like that, I’m afraid of ever meeting her.

If you get the chance to see the movie without paying $10, then go ahead. I paid more for my nachos & cheese and pop than I did for the movie. But I always felt that if you like an actor, the type of movie, then go spend the money.

To see this movie you have to suspend disbelief, sure, a body can go flinging off a movie vehicle and end up in another one without falling. Hey, she’s a trained spy operative! Will I buy the DVD? Probably, it IS Angelina Jolie. But if you’re not a fan of action movies, hate predictability, maybe you should skip this one.